December 11, 2020 |Marcus Neo

yes, there is still time to save your marriage!

watch the video below to discover what to stop doing and learn 3 key steps to remain happily married.

Without question, many relationships can do with far more vulnerability between partners. Something powerful happens when we are willing to bare ourselves to each other as a couple, knowing that rejection, judgement, or misunderstanding are possible.

However, vulnerability has limitations.

In this guest article, Marcus Neo shares a few powerful thoughts on the idea, and particularly in relation to relationships.

I accredit a lot of my motivation and success in my life by coming across books such as The Game by Neil Strauss and Models by Mark Manson.

These books formed how I perceived a lot of female attraction, relationships initially when I was busy trying to meet women in my earlier 20s.

I remembered reading Models, by Mark Manson, a dating advice book, at a younger age of 22–23, and that book introduced me to the basic idea of vulnerability.

The author proposed the idea of vulnerability as a central argument in his book. I bought that philosophy for half a decade.

Yes, vulnerability and honesty can get you results: my dating life improved to a certain extent.

couple on a date YWU5Y2R Vulnerability

However, as I got deeper into the ‘self-improvement’ world, I can’t help to think that vulnerability as a dating philosophy can work nicely on paper or theory, and aren’t really widely applicable in real life in certain circumstances.

For example, in the book, the author argues cites the assortment theory: the best way to change your relationships is to change yourself.

For example, there are good values such as honesty, assuming responsibility and changing yourself.

Yes, you should change yourself for a better outcome.

However, here lies an inherent problem: no matter how much you change yourself, there are going to be assholes in the world.

Marcus Neo

Hence, you should be more careful when interpreting such advice, for you may fall into a mode of constant self-blame or criticism.

Enter Taleb — a Clearer Way to Think

Enter, Nassim Taleb and his work: Skin in The Game.

Like all good books, the book gets your attention almost immediately, hence taking my full attention for the next couple of hours (or days).

It also shifted my perspective on the entire dating and relationships advice, motivational and self-help industry.

He argued that a lot of the social sciences from economics to psychology in general lack real-world application.

He argued that 40% of psychology studies aren’t replicable.

In simple terms: they don’t work, or may even work in reverse in the real world.

Fundamentally he argues that humans are self-centred and being universally nice is not practical.

This means you can’t be vulnerable to everyone on a universal basis.

For example, one only starts taking evolutionary psychology theories seriously when you’re interested in bettering your chance with the girl next door.

where to next 9WG3AQ6 Vulnerability

You take statistics and probability a lot more seriously when you’re option trading with real cash.

In all, he suggests that not everyone can treat everyone universally nicely.

It’s not practical.

Nassim Taleb explains: ‘you’re not equally nice to the milkman to your spouse.’

The idea that you can change your relationships just by being nice, honest or vulnerable to everyone is flawed.

How to Be Practical: No More Mr Nice Guy

Like it or not, dating and relationships are closely related to general life success.

If you can take rejection from approaching an attractive stranger on the street, you’ll generally be more competent at handling rejection, how you choose your life values and your ability to be vulnerable.

There came a point in my life where I decided I didn’t need to be ‘a better person’ or more virtuous to anyone.

I simply decided that a lot of people are merely assholes and that the majority of human beings (including myself) are self-centred creatures.

No matter how much you self-improve, the majority of your potential romantic interactions are going to go nowhere.

No matter how well-timed your jokes are, you are going to offend some people.

To put it simply, no matter how virtuous or moral, you can’t be universally nice to everyone.

In fact, let’s put it the way Taleb explains it: you aren’t universally nice to everyone.

The idea that you can be vulnerable and honest to everyone and your relationships will magically transform is a flawed idea.

You’ll still need to face rejection, stand up for yourself, and be controversial.

About the author

Marcus Neo

Enjoys writing about dating, relationship, business, and psychology. Introvert yet extrovert. Likes martial arts and music, but never got around to the latter.

is your marriage 'on the rocks?' then read the following NOW...

If you’re reading this right now, then chances are your marriage isn’t what it used to be… and maybe it’s so bad, that you feel like your world is falling apart.

You feel like all the passion, the love, and romance have completely faded.

You feel like you and your partner can’t stop yelling at each other.

And maybe you feel that there’s almost nothing you can do to save your marriage, no matter how hard you try.

But you’re wrong.

You CAN save your marriage — even if your husband or wife says they want a divorce.

You CAN rebuild that passion you felt for one another when you first kissed. And you can bring back that love and devotion you felt for one another when both of you said, “I love you” for the first time.

If you feel like your marriage is worth fighting for, then do yourself a favour and watch this quick video that will teach you everything you need to know about salvaging the most important thing in the world:

==> Watch the video 'Save Your Marriage Now' by Brad Browning now (VIDEO)!

In this video, you’ll learn the 3 critical mistakes that most couples commit that rip marriages apart. Most couples will never learn how to fix these three simple mistakes.

You’ll also learn a simple, proven “Marriage Saving” method that makes marriage counsellors look like kindergarten teachers.

So if you feel like your marriage is about to take its last few breaths, then I urge you to watch this quick video:

Make Your Spouse Adore You Again:

Watch this FREE training video!

You’ve got nothing to lose.


Except your marriage...

You may also like...

Do Your Goals Support Your Values?
“How do you deal with embarrassment? The kind that you may feel from health, financial or physical appearance issues.”