May 17, 2024 |Gideon Hanekom

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In this post, we’re looking at the 6 most popular sex positions for married couples that will help you spice up your sex life and keep feelings of intimacy alive for many years.

As a husband of over 16 years, I can definitely vouch that sex is one of the most wonderful and intimate activities that you and your spouse can share.

It is also one of the most important activities that directly affect marital satisfaction, as shown by research by Ziaee et al. (2014). 

Their study found that marital satisfaction was significantly associated with sexual satisfaction which suggested that with the increase of sexual satisfaction, marital satisfaction increased accordingly.

Additionally, sex also enhances your bond, increases your desire for each other, promotes good health, and offers the ability to embrace calls of desire from your spouse.

However, even though sexual intimacy is incredibly important for creating feelings of closeness and overall intimacy as a couple, and affect marital satisfaction, there is always a risk of sex losing its initial excitement and becoming boring after many years of married life.

This phenomenon is referred to as “sexual boredom”. 

Some studies have shown that sexual boredom has negative consequences for sexual relationship satisfaction and even negatively impacts marital quality.

These negative consequences may include a rise in infidelity and divorce (Hall & Fincham, 2006). 

So, that being the case, the important question for any married couples or long term couples becomes, “What Can We Do To Improve Our Sexual Experience?”

One of the best ways to avoid sexual boredom in your marriage and create a hotter experience is through varied sexual techniques and positions.

Not only will it require your body to become more accommodating to different sexual positions and techniques, but it will also give you new sensations that are highly pleasurable.

Also, on that note, the vast majority of women prefer sex with a man who has sexual skills and knows how to give them deep pleasure.

Now, whether you’re the woman or the man in the relationship, there are certain sexual positions that can really bring the fireworks.

163601 Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

That’s what we’re going to look at in the next section.

Introducing The Best Sex Positions For Married Life

There are many different sex positions that you can try with your partner to make your married life more enjoyable.

One of the best positions for married life is the missionary position, which allows for deep penetration and intimate contact.

Another great position is the doggy style position, which allows for deeper penetration and a more primal feel.

There are also positions that allow for a slow and more intimate connection such as the spooning position.

It’s a great way to bring your partner closer in such a relaxed manner, although it can be difficult to maintain at times.

When it comes to having good sex with your partner, don’t be too rigid in terms of the positions that you and your partner try.

Trying new positions is always a good idea, although it’s not necessary.

One of the best positions that you can try out when you’re trying to get more action in the bedroom is the missionary position.

The missionary position is a basic sexual position that allows for deep penetration and more intimate contact between the two of you that still allows you to reach climax.

For many people, this is the best way to have good sex in a married relationship.

Many people enjoy this position because of the intimacy and closeness that it offers.

The missionary position also tends to be good because there is not much movement involved in the actual sex act.

The two of you simply lie down in bed and then have sex.

It is a simple position, but it can also be one of the most intimate positions that you can ever have.

However, in saying all of that, the missionary position also has the inherent risk of becoming stale and boring, and that’s what we want to prevent.

We’ve already seen how important sexual intimacy is for marital satisfaction, although not the only factor of course, and must therefore be open to other popular sexual positions to spice up our marital sex lives indefinitely.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

So, before we look at the most popular sex positions for married couples, let’s quickly consider some of the benefits of trying new sex positions and why that is important for married life and long-term relationships in the long run.

The Benefits Of Trying New Sex Positions

The benefits of trying new sex positions are vast.

They can help keep a relationship spicy and exciting and can help prevent boredom in the bedroom.

Trying new positions can also help couples learn more about each other’s bodies and desires.

This can lead to a more fulfilling and connected sexual experience.

As well as that, you may also find that one of the most popular sex positions for married couples will be your favourite for life.

It could be that you end up preferring missionary as your go-to position and it could be that the popular sex positions for married couples don’t really do it for you.

But having more than one position to keep the romance alive in the bedroom could be really useful.

So what about the really popular sex positions for married couples?

What are they and how can you start experimenting with them?

The good news is that there are some really popular sex positions for married couples that can spice things up quickly but there are also other common sex positions that might not be as popular.

So, let’s explore some of the popular sex positions for married couples and what they entail.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

The 6 Best Sex Positions To Spice Up Your Love Life

There are so many different sex positions to choose from, but which one is right for you?

Well, as my wife says, that depends on your mood.

If you’re feeling adventurous, the reverse cowgirl position might be the perfect position for you. 

If you’re in the mood for something a little more intimate, the missionary position might be a better choice.

No matter what mood you’re in, there’s a perfect sex position for you that will work for the occasion! 

But in saying that I’m sure that every person has their own personal favourites, and below are mine in order of most favourite to less favourite (although still a favourite).

I also consulted my wife on these so I know she enjoys them too.

We’ve also considered some practical aspects of each, especially if you’re a plus-size couple or have flexibility issues. 

Also, some men have erection challenges due to medical reasons or have less penis length to work with, so we considered those as well.

So, with that said, let’s dive in.

1. Adapted Doggy Style

The Adapted doggy style is slightly different from the Traditional doggy style and is one of the best sex positions if you want deeper penetration.

We know that the doggy style might be a classic sexy sex position, but the adapted doggy style is frequently overlooked and definitely one of our favourites for all kinds of reasons.

One benefit is that the woman can rest on a pillow as she enjoys the sensation, which means you can go for longer, it allows for deeper penetration.

What makes this position especially good and enjoyable for both is that the woman can use her hands or a vibrator to please herself too.

This takes the pressure of the man to do all the work to ensure she climaxes before he does or at all.


Get into the doggy style position (with the woman on all fours and the man behind her), but then the woman lowers her upper body so that her arms and head are resting on the bed or pillow while her lower body remains raised.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

2. The L Train

The L Train sex position is a great way to spice up your sex life.

This sex position is great for when you want to get some pleasure from the woman and she just wants to relax and enjoy the experience.

This is one of our favourite sex positions as it’s super comfortable, does not require flexibility, is perfect for people who are overweight as it makes for easy penetration, and keeps everyone’s hands-free for exploring other parts of each other’s bodies while having intercourse.


Lie on your side and lift your upper leg so you’re making an L-shape with your body. Your partner gets on their knees and straddles your lower leg. 

This new angle results in a whole new way of feeling each other.

Plus, if full penetration doesn’t quite do it for you, the woman can press her clitoris against the man’s thigh for more stimulation or just reach down and pleasure herself however she wants (with or without a sex toy).

If the woman isn’t that flexible, she can just put her upper leg wherever it wants to go.

In fact, we have found that the more “tight” the leg entanglement is, the more intimate and intense the experience.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

3. Spooning

The spooning sex technique is a great way to get close and intimate with your partner. You both will be lying on your sides, facing the same direction.

One person will be in the back, and the other will be in the front.

Both will be facing the same direction.

This is an excellent sex position for those lazy mornings or after an afternoon snooze.

It’s super intimate, requires little energy, feels great and creates a sense of real closeness.

Spooning is a great relaxing way that lets you be intimate with your spouse.

One of this technique’s benefits is that it helps a man to relax, but still gives him full access to his woman while holding her in his arms.

An added benefit of this sex position is being able to reach around her body to touch her breasts with one hand while stimulating her clitoris with his other hand.


Lay down side by side front to back as if you’re sleeping in a spooning position.

The man is behind the woman and enters her from there.

Also, from this position, a couple can easily transition into The L Train position mentioned earlier.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

4. Stand And Deliver

The Stand and Deliver sex position is a great one for couples who want to add a little excitement to their sex life.

This position is similar to the classic doggy style position, but with the key difference of the woman standing and bending over.

This position feels good and is one of our favourites as it feels quite hot and spicey.

Additionally, if the woman is self-conscious of her stomach, this position is perfect because she’s essentially standing bent over and lying on the bed or table with her upper body if she so chooses.

This position allows for the man to thrust deep inside his woman while keeping her hands free to pleasure herself with her hands or vibrator if she wants.


Start with both of you standing, the woman in front of her man, facing away.

Then, she bends over at her waist. She can also choose to lie flat on a bed or table and have the man enter her from behind.

This position also works well in a shower or a small space (like a closet) with the woman bending over pressing against the wall with her hands.

This position is great because, from this position, the man can also easily bring a free hand in front of the woman’s body and stimulate her clitoris if she doesn’t want to do it herself.

Alternatively, a couple can also add more spice to the position by tying the woman’s hands behind her back with cuffs or a silk scarf.

She can also be blindfolded if she wants to be.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

5. Missionary Position 

One of the benefits of the missionary position is that it’s a classic for many reasons, one of which is that it tends to be the go-to position in the bedroom.

Also, in this position, there’s a good chance that you’ll be engaging in foreplay and change things up with other positions which will all contribute to reaching an orgasm.

It also offers plenty of options for clitoral stimulation, especially if the man aims to keep his penetration very shallow while mixing it up with deeper thrusts.

Although most married couples probably revert back to the missionary position and it has plenty of advantages, it’s also a position that can quickly become boring.

It’s important to mix things up to keep things fresh and fun.

Doing it that way will help to enhance your overall sex life because you’re experimenting with different positions.


The missionary sex position is one of the most popular positions because it is simple, comfortable, and allows for deep penetration.

To do the missionary sex position, the woman lies on her back and the man lies on top of her between her legs, facing her while penetrating her.

The woman could straddle the man with her legs and lower body to pull him in deeper if she enjoys that.

A major advantage of this position is that it’s very intimate, makes for great eye contact, and also offers ample opportunity to kiss passionately (on the mouth, in the neck, ears, and the woman’s breasts).

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

6. Cowgirl (Classic And Reverse)

The cowgirl position is another common sexual position that, along with the missionary position, can help you achieve an orgasm.

Like the missionary position, one of the benefits of the classic cowgirl position is that is a very intimate and personal sexual position that allows you to look into each other’s eyes while having sex. 

This can be a very relaxing and romantic experience, especially if you’re trying to get your partner off while not being too over the top.

The cowgirl position is also a common go-to position for women because it allows for a lot of clitoral stimulation, making this position good for women.


The cowgirl sex position is a great way to start off your lovemaking session.

It is easy to do and gives both partners a lot of control.

To do the cowgirl sex position, the woman straddles the man and lowers herself onto his penis.

She can then move up and down or in circles to find the rhythm and speed that feels best for her.

The reverse cowgirl position (see image below) is similar to the classic version, but obviously means the woman on top faces away from the man (like mounting a horse in reverse).

The end result for the woman’s pleasure is the same, however.

Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples
Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

So, there you have it; my 6 best sex positions to spice up your love life in married life.

However, there’s one more “technique” that I believe is paramount for your sex life; oral sex.

From personal experience, I can vouch that by adding oral sex to your sex life you will have a much higher likelihood to ensure arousal and orgasms.

In fact, I will go as far as to say that without using sex toys and oral sex, your sex is guaranteed to suffer “sexual boredom.” 

There are no two ways about it.

So, let’s talk about the “how to give” and the “what to do” part of the subject.

It all starts with learning how to use your tongue.

Oral sex is a delicate art, and you have to learn how to use your tongue properly. 

Therefore, you need to read up on the details of oral sex and also ask your spouse what they enjoy.

For example, personally, I do not like a blow job, but I love going down on my wife.

We also like using a small vibrator as part of our sexual experience.

We have found that by using tongues, hands, fingers, sex toys, and of course, genitals, we have a much more enjoyable sex life than without.

My favourite oral sex position is called “The Classic.”

There are many others and even variations to the above, but I found this one pretty good.

Here’s how to do it.

“The Classic”

The woman just lies back on a comfortable surface (typically a bed or couch) while the man lies on his stomach in between her legs and pleasures her with his mouth.

This position is great because it provides a lot of comfort for the giver and the receiver.

Also, by placing a pillow under the woman’s hips provides easier access to the parts she wants to be stimulated.

She can further choose to bend her knees, keep them flat on the bed, or wrap them around her partner’s head.

Moreover, he can use his hands to play with her breasts or insert his fingers in her vagina for additional stimulation.

oral position Most Popular Sex Positions for Married Couples

Last Thoughts

Sexual boredom is a common problem in long-term marriages.

It can be caused by a lack of variety in sexual positions, activities that are not intimate or exciting, or simply a lack of sexual activity.

As we’ve seen according to research by Ziaee, sexual boredom can affect marital satisfaction.

However, there are many wonderful and intimate activities that can help directly affect marital satisfaction and these activities can also help keep the marriage fresh and interesting.

Use the tips in this post and start experimenting in your sex life today.

I hope you found this useful and, please, leave your thoughts and comments below in the comments area.

I’d love to hear about your favourite positions and why.

About the author

Gideon Hanekom

Gideon Hanekom is the creator of, a popular relationship blog that ranks among the top 50 relationship blogs in 2024. The website helps couples to create happier, healthier, and more intimate relationships. Gideon is a trained professional counsellor and holds post-graduate degrees in Theology and Psychology. His articles have also been featured on respected platforms such as and The Good Men Project.

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