July 11, 2024 |Gideon

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In this post, you will discover some of the root causes of unhappiness in marriage and more innovative solutions for marital bliss. Keep reading to learn how you can address these and rekindle your love life.

Some Root Causes of Unhappiness in Marriage

Understanding why many people are unhappy in marriage requires a closer look at some of the common factors often contributing to marital unhappiness.

Research studies consistently indicate that things such as communication breakdowns, unmet expectations, emotional disconnection, and external stressors are some of the most significant contributors to unhappiness in marriage.

For instance, according to Dr. John Gottman, a leading relationship expert and researcher, “The key to a successful marriage lies in how well couples manage conflict and communicate with each other.”

Couples who struggle to communicate effectively are more likely to experience frequent arguments and misunderstandings, often resulting in a decline in marital satisfaction.

Unmet expectations also play a crucial role in why individuals may feel not happy in marriage.

Couples often enter marriage with certain expectations regarding roles, responsibilities, and emotional support.

When these expectations are not met, disappointment and frustration can arise.

Unmet expectations can easily lead to feelings of resentment and a sense of being unappreciated, further straining the marital relationship.

Emotional disconnection is another significant factor contributing to unhappiness in marriages.

Over time, couples may find that they have grown apart emotionally, leading to a lack of intimacy and closeness.

Unhappy young couple with relationship problem. Family problems concept.

This is perhaps one of the more complex and severe issues that tend to end relationships.

Dr. Sue Johnson, a clinical psychologist, emphasizes that “emotional attunement, where partners are responsive to each other’s emotional needs, is essential for a healthy marriage.”

When emotional needs are neglected, couples may feel isolated and unsupported, exacerbating marital dissatisfaction.

External stressors, such as financial pressures, work-related stress, and family obligations, can also negatively impact marital happiness.

External stressors often lead to increased tension and conflict within the relationship, as couples may have less time and energy to invest in nurturing their marriage.

Now, the question becomes, what do you do about these issues if they’re present in your marriage?

Well, firstly, by identifying and understanding these root causes, i.e., awareness, couples can take proactive steps to address the underlying issues that contribute to feeling not happy in marriage.

You have no leverage or power to fix anything in your marriage if you lack awareness of what’s going on.

Moreover, sometimes, using conventional advice will be ineffective, which means we must think outside the box.


Innovative Solutions for Marital Happiness

Many couples find themselves not happy in marriage despite following conventional advice.

And to address this, it is sometimes crucial to explore innovative solutions that go beyond the usual suggestions.

One such method is the ‘relationship audit.’

This essentially involves a comprehensive review of various aspects of your relationship, such as communication, intimacy, and shared goals.

Young couple discussing issues in their relationship

You can set aside time to discuss your findings, feelings, and create a plan for improvement that works for you.

For instance, as a couple, you might discover that you need to work on your financial planning together, which can lead to a shared sense of purpose and reduce stress.

Another interesting approach is practising radical honesty (use with caution!).

This method essentially encourages partners to express their true feelings and thoughts without fear of judgment.

While this can be challenging, it can also foster a deeper level of trust and understanding.

For example, a couple might schedule a weekly ‘honesty hour’ where they openly discuss their frustrations and fears. Over time, this can help to resolve underlying issues that can contribute to unhappiness in their marriage.

But again, use it with caution.

If you use this method with the intent to hurt your spouse, you will definitely end up hurting your marriage instead.

Engaging in shared novel activities is another effective strategy.

Some experts and research indicate that couples who participate in new and exciting activities together experience increased relationship satisfaction.

This could be as simple as taking as making a new dish for dinner, hiking a new trail, or even travelling to an unfamiliar destination.

It doesn’t matter what you do; the key is to break the routine and create positive, shared experiences that reignite passion and connection.

Lastly, leveraging technology for relationship enhancement can offer unique benefits.

Young couple playing online games with smartphone in bedroom

One example is that some apps designed for couples can facilitate better communication, manage shared tasks, and even provide personalized relationship advice.

For instance, an app that sends daily prompts for meaningful conversations can help couples stay connected or address issues before they escalate.

Similarly, wellness apps that track mood and stress levels can offer insights into how external factors may affect your marriage and give a couple a chance to address those.

Also, I’ve recently heard how some couples in long-distance relationships use online games and apps to spend time together while apart.

This could be as simple as playing a virtual board game or playing as a team together.

Regardless of what you choose, engaging in these types of activities can help create shared experiences and maintain a sense of connection.

The point of these interesting strategies is that by incorporating these more innovative solutions, couples can move beyond traditional advice and discover fresh, actionable ways to overcome their unhappiness in marriage.

Couple fishing at lake docks

These methods not only have the potential to address some root causes of marital unhappiness but also provide practical steps for building a more fulfilling and harmonious relationship.

The key is to get creative and avoid making something more complicated than it is.

Some challenges actually have simple solutions if applied and maintained.

Real Couples Who Transformed Their Marriages

Despite the fact that many couples face moments when they are not happy in their relationship, there are also numerous stories of couples who have successfully navigated these rough waters and emerged stronger together.

By employing similar innovative strategies and solutions as above, they have rekindled the love and happiness that once seemed lost.

Here, we share a few inspiring success stories of real couples who transformed their marriages.

One such story is of Sarah and John, who had been married for over a decade.

Over time, they found themselves drifting apart, feeling more like roommates than partners.

That is a common issue with many couples I’ve worked with in the past as a relationship coach.

However, they decided to seek help and came across the concept of ’emotional check-ins’.

By dedicating time each week to discuss their feelings and concerns openly, they began to understand each other better.

That not only improved their communication, but also reignited the emotional connection they once shared.

smiling young couple dating in cafe

Today, Sarah and John report feeling more connected and satisfied in their marriage than ever before.

Another couple, Maria and Carlos, struggled with balancing their professional and personal lives, leading to frequent conflicts and dissatisfaction.

They turned to the strategy of ‘shared goals and activities’.

By setting common goals and engaging in activities they both enjoyed, such as hiking and cooking, they were able to rebuild their bond.

This helped them to feel more united in their journey, fostering a sense of partnership and mutual support.

Maria and Carlos now describe their marriage as a harmonious blend of companionship and collaboration.

Lastly, we have the story of Emily and David, who faced issues of trust and communication breakdown.

They adopted the method of ‘mindful listening’, where they practiced being fully present during conversations, without interruptions or judgments.

This is harder than you think, by the way.

However, this helped them to rebuild trust and foster a deeper understanding of each other.

Emily and David’s marriage has since seen a remarkable turnaround, with a renewed sense of intimacy and trust.

I can share with you several other stories of past examples of where couples started disconnecting but by simply introducing a small change, they managed to reestablish connection and mend their marriages.

These types of examples serve as powerful reminders that even when one is not happy in marriage, with the right strategies and commitment, it is possible to reignite love and happiness.

They also highlight the importance of simple but profound principles like healthy communication, shared activities, and emotional connection in transforming any marriage from a state of unhappiness to one of joy and fulfilment.

But, maybe you need a bit more help and support than that because your relationship has been struggling for much longer.

If that’s the case, then you need some additional help.

So, I’d like to suggest checking out relationship expert Brad Browning (over 600,000 on YouTube) and what he says about turning most struggling marriages around.

Discover the Secrets to a Happier Marriage with Mend the Marriage

Let me start with a bold claim: marriage isn’t rocket science, but saving a struggling one often feels like it.

But what if I told you there are marriage-saving techniques you’ve likely never encountered before?

That’s exactly what Brad Browning offers in his Mend the Marriage program.

Brad Browning's mend the marriage program to fix unhappiness in marriage

First, imagine starting your journey with a personal video where Brad Browning walks you through the crucial first steps to begin healing your marriage.

This video explains exactly what you need to do right away to start righting the wrongs and avoid common marriage-destroying mistakes.

Next, ever wish you could make your spouse let go of negative memories and rekindle their love for you?

With the Forever Phrase, you’ll tap into your spouse’s positive memories, creating a powerful sense of nostalgia that reignites their desire to save the marriage.

Next, are you struggling to get your partner to commit to fixing your marriage?

So, learn how to gently guide them towards the idea of saving your marriage, making them believe it was their idea all along.

Imagine your spouse apologizing and promising never to let your marriage face such a crisis again.

Then, wouldn’t it be wonderful to know exactly what your spouse needs from you without them saying a word?

Brad’s program teaches you how to effortlessly “read” your spouse’s mind and understand their needs intuitively.

Arguments can be toxic, but what if you could stop any argument in its tracks?

With his Dispute Defusing System, you’ll leave your spouse feeling heard and respected without compromising your own stance.

This is the single most effective way to prevent conflict in a relationship.

Further, do you want to become your spouse’s ultimate source of desire?

Using a unique blend of reverse psychology and smooth words, you’ll learn how to infuse a rush of sexual desire within your spouse, making you their one and only “sexual drug.”

If, however, cheating and jealousy are eating away at your relationship, then with Brad’s Forgiveness Technique, your spouse will be begging for forgiveness and promising to stay faithful until death do you part.

It’s a bold claim, but I think he can deliver. He makes equally big promises and guarantees also.

Additionally, it’s also crucial to ensure your children are shielded from the emotional fallout of marital conflicts.

But Brad’s program teaches you how to protect your kids from the current crisis, ensuring they remain emotionally safe and secure.

Also, imagine maintaining a lifelong bond with your partner using a simple yet effective concept that requires minimal effort.

According to Brad, The Connection Account can literally divorce-proof your marriage, keeping your relationship strong and devoted.

Finally, discover the Big 6 Bond Builders—simple but powerful actions that will make your partner forget about all doubts and uncertainties.

These steps will bring you closer and more intimate than ever before.


If you’re ready to transform your marriage, then don’t wait.

Dive into Brad Browning’s Mend the Marriage program today by pressing the orange button below.

This will take you to the first step towards a happier, more fulfilling relationship.

To learn more about the program and how it can benefit your relationship, visit the official Mend the Marriage website and take the first step towards rekindling the love and satisfaction in your marriage.

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About the author


Gideon is the creator of TheRelationshipGuy.com, a popular relationship blog that ranks among the top 50 relationship blogs in 2024. The website helps couples to create happier, healthier, and more intimate relationships. Gideon is a trained professional counsellor and holds post-graduate degrees in Theology and Psychology. His articles have also been featured on respected platforms such as Marriage.com and The Good Men Project.

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