3 Things A Man Wants From A Woman | Healthy Relationship Advice About Love And Life

3 Things A Man Wants From A Woman

By James Bauer, 20 Sep 2021


There are 3 things a man wants from a woman (and it is NOT to have the perfect woman)

Let’s start with a simple question.

How much time do you spend trying to be the kind of woman you think men want?

If you’re like most women, it’s a LOT.

You most likely spend a lot of time making yourself look nice and attractive… perhaps even sexy.

Woman applying make up in the bathroom

All this time presenting yourself as fun, interesting, worldly, and not needy in the slightest.

You spend all this time showing him just how good you’d be for him…

How amazing life is or could be with you by his side…

And it doesn’t work.

It never works.

Or at least not long term.

WHY?

Why do you work so hard, and the guy in your life just takes you for granted… if he even notices at all?

It’s probably because he’s immature, right?

He can’t recognise a good thing until it’s gone.

Or maybe…

It’s because you’ve been doing all the work for him.

What do I mean?

Simple…

If A Man Doesn’t Have to Work for A Relationship With You, He Won’t Value It!

Here’s a FACT…

What men value most are those things they have to work hard to get.

Hand a man a college diploma, and he won’t value it as much as if he’d had to put in years of study and effort to earn it.

Hand a man the perfect girlfriend, and he won’t value her as much as if he’d had to woo her for weeks just to get her to go out with him.

desperate and sad sitting woman on couch holding a phone texting

This is why playing “hard to get” works for the most part.

But, as you’ve probably already noticed…

There’s also a BIG problem with playing hard to get.

That strategy stops working once he’s actually got you.

Something happens when guys decide they’ve “won” you.

It’s almost like they think, “Game over.”

Their minds are already on their next challenge.

So, what is happening here and how can you stop it from wrecking your relationship(s)?

Well, firstly, understand that…

It’s Not Just You – ALL Women Experience This (and that’s why they ask for help)

Many women give up on love.

They never let themselves get too close to a man, for fear of scaring him off.

But other women try a different approach.

They get help… from someone like me, a relationship coach.

I noticed that many clients were coming to me, complaining about guys who were blowing hot and cold.

Everything would be going great, and then it was like…

Something would change overnight.

A guy who’d been warm, affectionate and interested would suddenly become distant.

He’d no longer have any time for her.

He wouldn’t smile in greeting.

He’d stop making eye contact.

His kisses were brusque.

So, since I wanted to help my clients, I started investigating this more to find out what is happening.

And what I discovered made sense of everything.

I knew why these men were backing away.

I knew what my clients needed … and what they weren’t getting.

It didn’t come down to anything wrong with any of these women.

Rather, it all comes down to something I call “The Hero Instinct.”

knight on a horse at sunset

Most Women Do Something that Drives Men Away… Without Ever Realising It

One of the most wonderful things about women is how naturally caring they are.

Look at you.

You’re most likely always there for your guy.

You look after him.

You always make time for him.

You’d do anything for him.

BUT, you never realise that, in the process, you’re actually taking something away from him.

You’re taking away his purpose.

You see, he wants to be your hero.

He does NOT want YOU to be his hero.

Men love heroes.

Look at how many grown men are still fascinated by Marvel comics and superhero movies.

Closeup portrait of a nice little superhero over blue sky background, a cheerful child wearing superman mask and cape, happy childhood concept

Every man on Earth, from the time he was a boy, dreamed of growing up to be the kind of hero who would save the world—and get the girl at the same time.

Most men don’t get to indulge their world-saving side in their 9-5 jobs.

Circumstances don’t call for them to rip off their corporate ties and spring into action, revealing their superman side.

Maybe they can’t save the world.

But they can still get the girl.

Getting the girl is a worthy challenge for an ordinary guy with the heart of a superhero.

It takes superhuman confidence.

Superhuman charm.

Superhuman immunity to pain.

Now, all he needs to find is a girl who needs a hero.

And… that’s where the problem starts.

Let me ask you this…

Do You Need a Hero?

Let me guess…

That’s NOT you.

Portrait of a beautiful businesswoman sitting at a table with red notebook, pen, smartphone and a drink on it.

You’re strong.

You’re independent.

You can fix a leaky faucet.

You can drive a stick shift.

You can take care of yourself.

You’re never going to make that Jerry Maguire mistake of looking for a man to complete you.

Instead, in your mind, you have a lot to offer a man.

You’re generous.

Kind.

Loving.

Giving to a fault.

All you want is to find a man who’s willing to receive all you have to give.

Woman waiting for somebody in cafe

And that’s why heroes aren’t showing up in your life!

That’s why you’ve ended up with so many takers instead.

Guys who take everything you have and leave you high and dry.

If you want a hero, then you need to “advertise” for one.

Here’s how.

3 Ways You Can Invite a Hero into Your Life, Starting Today

Young man teaching woman how to use an app on smartphone. Couple using cell phones for internet and social media.

1. Ask a guy for help.

Ask him for advice on buying a new computer.

Ask him to listen to that weird rattling sound that’s started up in your car.

Ask him to reach something on the top shelf.

Then thank him warmly, with a great big smile of appreciation.

No, that doesn’t make you needy.

It makes you a woman with space for a man in her life.

Charming couple of lovers having fun and enjoying each others company, monkeying in their spacious apartments

2. Take pleasure in male company.

Guys love women who appreciate men for just being men.

So what if his apartment is a shrine to sports?

So what if he spends hours on his fantasy football team?

So what if his idea of a clean shirt is the one with the fewest wrinkles?

He’s a guy.

It’s okay.

You don’t need him to be more like you, because you’ve got the feminine side of the gender equation covered.

man fixing a pushbike

3. Let him earn your respect.

Superheroes love challenges.

They don’t want to be given a gold medal just for showing up.

They don’t want your love handed to them on a plate.

They want to earn it.

There’s one thing they crave even more than a woman’s eternal enduring love:

A challenge.

So give him opportunities to prove himself.

You don’t have to do the work of winning him over.

Sit back, relax, and allow him the pleasure of winning your admiration.

Keep Learning

I’ve said this before, but men are simple creatures.

And if you want to attract or keep a good man in your life, then you need to learn how to work with the male psychology instead of against it.

You can be a strong and accomplished woman… AND still allow a man to woo you.

Because unless you don’t, the good ones will either stay away or not stay long!

If that sounds like something you want to learn to do more, click here to watch a video presentation about this relationship enhancement strategy

It’s something you can learn once but then use for the rest of your life, whether you’re dating or married!

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Why Men Pull Away

About the author 

James Bauer

James Bauer is a recognized author and relationship expert. He started his career as a professional psychologist and is the author of the ‘His Secret Obsession program.‘