July 16

Developing Self-Awareness in Your Life


So many of us run on auto-pilot all day, every day. Few of us ever stop to reflect on WHY I do what I do, or WHY I react the way I do whenever this or that. Join me today for a short chat on how to change this, in order to reduce times of conflict AND deepen your levels of connection.

What is self-awareness?

The dictionary defines self-awareness as

“knowledge and awareness of your own personality or character.”

When you’re self-aware, you have an accurate and clear understanding of your personality, strengths, weaknesses, and beliefs.

You know what makes you tick.

But, self-awareness also includes an understanding of how others perceive you.

This is important for developing a more accurate picture of how your thoughts, emotional state, and behaviour influence others around you.

smartphone-download-6-secrets-eguideWhen we lack self-awareness, it can lead to a very confusing and frustrating life!

You end up thinking, feeling, and doing certain things with limited or unwanted results, without every considering HOW you’re contributing to it!

So, as I mentioned in the video, your level of self-awareness influences your relationships, and by extension, career and happiness.

When we continue to function on auto-pilot without paying attention to our internal process and reactions to our environment, we run the risk of seriously affecting our happiness and results in life.

Increasing your self-awareness is most crucial for taking control of yourself, and thereby all parts of your life.

Consider these three elements of developing self-awareness:

  1. Self-awareness is necessary for taking control of your life.

The direction of your life is determined by your thoughts, beliefs, emotions, and reactions.

Self-awareness is the principle way of understanding and manipulating these things.

Self-awareness highlights faulty beliefs and emotional reactions that stand in your way and gives you the power to make adjustments.

  1. Self-awareness illuminates the real reasons for past failures and challenges.

We often dismiss our failures as bad luck or a lack of proper timing.

It’s much more likely that you failed to perceive the situation, others, and yourself accurately.

It’s much easier to see the reason behind the relationship, work, and other struggles when you can look at yourself clearly.

Do you consistently struggle at work or in your relationships?

It’s only logical to conclude that you’re doing something ineffectively.

Those who lack self-awareness are puzzled by their negative outcomes or blame others exclusively.

  1. Self-awareness is a critical quality for leaders.

One study concluded that a high degree of self-awareness was the best predictor of success for executives.

Executives that have an understanding of their weaknesses are able to build a team composed of members that fill those weaknesses.

A lack of self-awareness puts a limit on your leadership abilities.

Self-awareness is the foundation for personal progress.

Without it, any personal development efforts will be severely hampered. Building greater self-awareness won’t happen overnight, but it can be developed.

I hope you seriously consider the importance of developing self-awareness in your life, as it has the potential to improve a lot.

Live and love fully!

Gideon H.




About the author
Gideon Hanekom

Gideon Hanekom is a relationship coach and the creator of The Relationship Guy – a Top Marriage Coaching and Relationship Advice Blog that helps married couples create healthier relationships. He is a trained professional counsellor and one of New Zealand’s top relationship bloggers and coaches. He’s been happily married for over fourteen years and is a dad of two.​ He also holds Bachelor and Master degrees in the field of Theology and is currently studying post-graduate Psychology at Massey University.

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